prepare to be unprepared

Chevron Houston Marathon is this Sunday and I have been spending a lot of time thinking about how to up my mental game while knowing my physical game isn’t quite there. I’ve been running, but not “marathon training” since Ridge to Bridge at the end of October and my body is definitely not in as good a shape. I am still running, working out, etc but taking a closer look at the miles I have run the past couple of months solves ye great mystery of why I don’t feel as fit as I felt six months ago. It’s probably been said over and over for the past couple of months, but finishing grad school/out of state move/starting my dietetic internship were obvious priorities over long runs most weekends and weekdays. It is what it is – I know some people who despise that phrase, but I like it. Simple, basic. Nothing to it.

So, the world and I are in agreement that I have not scientifically coordinated my training to culminate in ultimate physical prowess this Sunday in Houston. Now what? Now my question is, what can I do? Do I start at what feels like a reasonably safe pace until I feel like I’m going to yarf and then slowly deathjog it in? This is actually my usual “strategy,” so maybe I need to downgrade to starting really, really slow…and tapering, as the saying goes. Then I wonder, how slow does my finish have to be to rank as disappointing or acceptable? Certainly I will be very happy with any finish and I don’t think it’s a given that you will always finish because you never know. I don’t think I’m in any worse shape than I was for my first marathon, but now the difference is that I know better! I know that 13.1 is not really halfway through, “only 10k to go!” can mean an eternity, and they can find some real bastard hills to slow up the last tenth of a mile, possibly even in flat Houston. One single goal: have funskies. I am going to try to start extra slow for real; unfortunately lately even running slow does not feel that slow which is kind of a concern. Also, the weather forecast is calling for chance of thunderstorms and has not broken this information down into hourly predictions yet. Harrumph.

Other complaints: I hate flying and haven’t flown anywhere in over five years. I panic and sweat and cuss and grip the armrest and think about what a dumbass I am to be in some POS aircraft 40,000 feet off the ground. I can’t think about it right now or I will not go – in historic 2010 when I entered the lottery for the race, I thought I would either be living in Houston (my second choice internship was there) or sitting at home doing nothing if I didn’t get matched to a DI and I would drive out there. Flying wasn’t on my mind. The worst is going to be when I get there and realize that I have to fly home. The good part about that will be that I won’t be expected to run a marathon shortly thereafter and I am plenty old enough to have a drink on the plane.

Tomorrow is the last day of my first internship rotation in food systems management. It’s been real. I start a new rotation at the hospital Monday morning. I am sure I will make a great first impression when I can barely descend stairs, still have salt crusted to my eyebrows, or can’t write anything because I have fingers the size of bratwursts. Whee!